it’s disgusting

January 21, 2010 - Leave a Response

“it’s disgusting , how I love you
god , I hate it , I could kill you”

it’s true . the things i put myself through because of you . “thank you the sex was good , i’ll admit it.” obviously the first and only thing that comes to mind is bekka . and of course i’m suspicious and making assumptions . yeah , i’m thinking up things in my head . “bet he was fighting with her . i bet that’s what the whole “if you dont want to make me smile, someone else can do it” was about . probably the only reason he talked to me and was so nice that day is because as always he needed me to lift him up when she was getting him down . bet things are working out better between them, bit by bit . he’s not over her . he’s going to start spending even more time talking with her now i’m out of the picture . bet you soon she’s going to suck him in to being with her again and he’s going to become a bragging bitch about it and beg for my help and companionship when things go wrong . ugh . bet that’s why you’re not talking to me all of a sudden . it’s disgusting , the things i do to myself because of you . i hate this , i’m going to be sick .

i’m done

January 10, 2010 - Leave a Response

completely . from this point on , you no longer exist to me . i’d love to say goodbye , but i can’t find anything good about it .

robbed blind

January 6, 2010 - Leave a Response

I feel like an every day douche bag , and I don’t even own anything Ed Hardy . All the music I listen to and have been listening to since juniour high or earlier is now becoming mainstream . Yes , I am taking it personally . It always meant something to me to listen to music others didn’t . Songs and artists were like my own secret little treasures , for me to and the few specific people I selected to enjoy .

Porcelain and the Tramps
USS
Owl City
LMFAO
3OH!3
Gucci Mane
Taylor Swift
Lady Gaga
M.I.A.

Just wait and see – $20 from any of you says Goldielocks will be next . Fuck .

a land where skittle trees grow

January 4, 2010 - Leave a Response

Fuck relationships – heterosexual , homosexual , and otherwise . I have decided I am going to become asexual and found my own country . Since I am asexual I have decided despite scientific limitations , I am going to give birth to only Swedish children . They will work in my country’s factories producing inexpensive , modern , practical furniture .

I will call this beautiful land Swina ( Sweden / China / H1N1 ) . It combines the innovative design concepts and physical attractiveness of the Swedes , the cheap , immoral child labour practices of the Chinese , and the practicality of H1N1’s ability to wipe out large portions of a population when it’s number become too high ( because we all know that my vagina is really a metaphor for Swina’s sweatshops , as it is a powerhouse of baby making capability ) .

Curling will not be a national sport and I will import various exotic animals from Africa and Australia . The main staple of the Swinanese peoples’ diets will be dairy and rice products . Skittles will be served with each meal .

Give me a shout if you’re interested in becoming a part of my country and if I deam you Swedish enough , I’ll consider allowing your admittance .

Your awesome , kickass , totally sick president ,

Bryn Arnt (:

still for pants

January 4, 2010 - Leave a Response

Between a quote I found from Albert Einstein, and an essay a friend wrote, I was able to start something very rare. And intelligent conversation. It has to do with conscious energy. Sorry for the grammatical errors.

Bryn: A human being is a part of the whole, called by us ‘Universe,’ a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something seperate from the rest– a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prsion by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. Nobody is able to achieve this completely, but the striving for such achievement is in itself a part of the liberation and a foundation for inner security. “A kind of optical delusion of his consciousness.” It is said that everything consists of different energies. Is conscious thought itself an energy? If so is it posessed by humans alone, or does my dog for instance know and aknowledge his own existance? If conscious thought is an energy, does it survive the death of the body? Or does it too break down to a more pure form to be reincarnated as something entirely different?

Anonymous: If conscious thought is an energy, then there is a specific quantity of it that can never be exceeded or destroyed. Therefore the only difference would be in the concentration of energy. If this is too be true than all that exists does so in a system that maintains balance. For this theory then all life is placed on this balance…does that mean that through the ceaseless expansion of humanity that the energy from other forms of life are being sapped? Also, if we all live on a balance then there is not one act that can be disconnected from another. Does that mean we are collectively responsible for every event ever to take place in the course of time? Does your dog know of it’s own existence? Is a blade of grass aware of it’s existence? I believe that if any entity in question attempts to prevent its own death, that it is aware of it’s existence. Under my belief then, even a atom is aware of it’s existence. Does this mean that the entity is sentient or conscious? I personally believe so….though I would not go as far as to say that each conscious being has individual personalities or characteristics. For the lack of individuality as a single unit, collective conscious are allotted. *Sigh* but that isn’t to say that entities with individual characteristics are not capable of collective consciousness. Because if consciousness is energy then it is of a specific quantity and incapable of not being connected. Therefore, everything in existence has a collective conscious. The variance in consciousness can only be described as different divisions of an “ultimate consciousness”. If conscious thought is an energy, it does not survive the death of a body, because energy is not alive. Energy cannot change in quantity, thereby making it beyond our concepts of life or death (survival as well). So this being my theory, then the human body is not capable of death, only a change in the concentration of energy. The human body being a part of the specific quantity will only be allocated to another existence. Is conscious thought an energy? My answer is no. I do not believe in consciousness or energy.

Bryn: You state in your response that each entity has a form of consciousness about it, “Under my belief then, even an atom is aware of its existence.” Yet you continue on to say that energy does not survive the death of a body because it is not “alive” when your argument for each entity having a consciousness is the sake of survival. If an atom is the smallest constituent of matter and energy, and cannot be destroyed or created but only transferred from one form to another, what is the logic behind each atom having conscious energy? If it cannot be destroyed, where is the need for survival? Or does each atom contain a “particle” or such of conscious energy so that they may collectively provide an adequate amount of conscious energy to the entity which consists of them? If for the purpose of survival, just think, how much conscious energy is not used, but rather stored in abiotic entities. If this were the case, would there be any possible way to “tap into” these resources? If so what would be the effect on the world? If we make the assumption that all biotic entities are pre-programmed to survive, we could take them all out of the conscious energy equation, save ourselves (as most and definitely all substantial evidence towards conscious thought is of the human variety). Does this conscious energy exist within an open system, in which all energy can be traced back to a form of “pure” energy within its existence, in which case all energy is recycled through various energy systems? Is more conscious energy derived from other energy sources as the human population expands to meet the demand? Or does conscious energy exist in its own closed system in a fixed amount? If so, is it evenly distributed and exponentially diluted as it parallels the exponential growth of the human race? Or do some reap the rewards and benefits while others are offered an inadequate amount of conscious energy, which has gone unnoticed only due to their abilities to adapt to surviving with the inadequate amount? “Also, if we all live on a balance then there is not one act that can be disconnected from another. Does that mean we are collectively responsible for every event ever to take place in the course of time?” Using simple physics principles (even Newton’s 3 laws alone would suffice), we are able to prove (in theory) that yes, every “act” or event results from another event which has preceded it. On the other hand, whether or not we are collectively responsible could be infinitely argued. On a side note, the concept of responsibility would not be possible without the ability of cognitive thought, which it would seem goes hand in hand with conscious thought. Does this mean that we as humans are forced to bare the responsibility of the entire world, because we cannot be disconnected, and are the only ones aware of this concept? The more general question would be does ignorance void you of all responsibilities? Though now I’m just getting off topic. I’m afraid I can’t remember much else of what I said in my original response, and if I continue you might not be able to get through the entire thing, so I’ll cut myself short here with a bit on your concluding statement. “My answer is no. I do not believe in consciousness or energy.” I have to admit that although I’m not sure whether or not I misinterpreted this or perhaps it didn’t come out the way you intended, I am none the less dumbfounded by it. Is this to say that you don’t believe in conscious energy, or that you believe in neither consciousness nor energy? If the later, I’m extremely interested to hear your explanation for, well, our existence and that of the world (as it can almost be defined in its simplest form as the transfer of energy in a partially-closed system, and our perception of it as our conscious rendition of the events that result from said energy transfers).

And people think I’m just anothe dumb blond , haha !